To forgive & forget.

 Today, like many other days, I indulged in a little bit of random thinking. A not so recent conversation with a friend of mine lingered for awhile, and as nomadic as ever, my mind decided to let the thinking run its own course.

     We were talking, and somehow we landed on the topic of women. This happened a while ago, so I don’t remember the exact details, only the essence of it. Which is the only thing you need to know to understand where I’m going with this.

     And so, it went like this:

Friend: You women remember everything huh..

Me: Well..I guess we just pay particular attention to certain little details more than men..

Friend: Yeah..that’s why you don’t forget things. Women are so sensitive..it’s scary sometimes. That’s why they say not to incur a woman’s wrath. Vengeful women are scaryyy...

Me: Okay, chup. I fail to see the connection here. How did not forgetting turn into being vengeful?

     I remembered him making a smart reply, but I can’t seem to recall. The only thing that’s left imprinted in my mind is the little smirk on his face. Maybe I didn’t get to rebut his point, that’s why the thought is still lingering, eager to be voiced out. But anyhow, our repartee went on for some time, but we were already talking about other things that I couldn’t be bothered to bring up this topic again.

    Anyhowwww, I digress. My initial point is that he was implying that the fact that women remember things vividly, especially if they’re something not “important” since they’re all in the past, women are deemed..scary, because they tend to be vengeful.

   Just because you don’t forget, does not mean you don’t forgive. It’s not like you purposely try so hard to remember those things, but sometimes, just sometimes, you can’t forget. It’s not that you want to hold on to them to seek revenge or something. You just do. Hell, I’d give my right arm if I could forget certain things, but no. That’s just not the way mind works.

    It’s like learning something, for example. When you’ve acquired something, say, some knowledge perhaps. After some time, you might think you’ve forgotten it. But you don’t, it's somewhere deep in the depths of your mind, you just can’t recall it now, but it might resurface later. My point is, you can’t un-know stuff. It’s not like there’s a button for you to delete what you’ve already known. Robot ka? And that’s why sometimes even after you’ve forgiven someone about something, you don’t forget. Not because you wanna hold it against him so that he would forever be in your bad-book or something. Takda kerja lain ka? -_-

     This is probably why it irks me a wee bit when people say “You have to forgive AND forget!”, stressing especially on the latter. It’s okay if by forgetting you mean to not let it bother you, but more often than not, that is not the case. What happened to me, at least.

    Ah, but then this is just my two cents. *shrug* 

and i came tumbling after.

if falling down was a major step to becoming a professional skier, then I'm on the right track to becoming one.

apparently i fell down more than i skied. -_-

but honestly if you ask me if i had fun,

i'd say a double helping of "oh yeaa you bet!"

i've always longed to pull challenging stunts and i don't get that opportunity often. so i was very glad i went. 

despite feeling like i've got broken bones and crushed limbs soon afterwards. geez.

i'm not comfortable with heights. so you could imagine me alternately cursing and praying the whole way on the ski lift. gatal nak naik, padahal the beginner's hill kat bawah pun kelam kabut control ski.

honestly i had no idea the hills would be so bloody steep. and yours sincerely, the bravely *coward* amateurish skier looked down the hills with euphoric desire to ski down full speed ahead. 

and..down she tumbled. :D 

but really it was fun, there weren't many people around and I got back up on my feet the minute I fell and skied and fell. and skied and fell. 

the hardest part i'd say was the time to get back up on your feet once you fell. What with the heavy ski shoes and ski equipment, I felt like a sumo struggling to stand up on the slope. 

all in all, i enjoyed myself, even the falling part. or maybe especially the falling part. i loved every bit of falling. I mean, the ache and pain aside, i loved it when i skied with great speed until there came a point when i don't feel afraid anymore. heck, i didn't even think. 

until i fell down and hurt every muscle and sinew in my body, that is.  -_-

but what i loved most was the part where i didn't care that i fell. i don't mind falling down really, just not in front of people. i felt like i lost my inhibition and had all my focus on having fun. just that. fun. 

no need to worry about looking like a fool, people laughing at me, or feeling embarrassed. 

gravity was temporarily on hold, i was flying, i felt free. 

only that i was constantly reminded of how fragile i was when the pain kicked in. dang.

next time i'm gonna master the techniques and practice down below before i'd have the right to go higher up. the reason why i fell was because i had no idea how to make it stop. the more i tried to stop, the faster i went. it was exhilarating, until i realized i wouldn't stop until i actually hit something. or somebody. God forbid. -_- the only way i knew to stop going down was by letting myself fall back. so i did. and it wasn't  graceful, i assure you. :D

anyways, here's the map:

skied through lower sandy's run, methinks. the oval part was where i had a major fall. haha. mcm proud je jatuh. i must have hit my head too hard. -__-

the only regret i have is not taking pics. damn, my falling down pictures would be priceless! but on second thought, thank God there weren't any. though i hurt every joint and muscle, at least my pride isn't. heee ;P

Criminology 101.

For 12 days in a row, I had bludgeoned my mind, senses and concentration with a marathon of 3 seasons of Criminal Minds. And by that I mean, 6-7 hours of back-to-back episodes a day. Needless to say, I couldn't help feeling amazed (despite the fear that comes with it) at the fragility of human's minds and emotions.

I've come to love EVERY one of the characters:

1. HOTchner's lack of emotional display (did I mention that he's HOT?),
2. Reid's amazing store of knowledge and eidetic memory, which makes his ignorance towards popular culture (ie. the Cullens) even more adorable,
3. Prentiss's steady disposition,
4. JJ's dedication,
5. Morgan and Garcia's flirtatious rapport, and
6. Rossi's witty remarks (though sometimes his a lil-amateur-ish acting skills become apparent).
7. And I miss Mandy Patinkin (who played Gideon) too. He just embodied the character as the best profiler so much that I felt the loss when he quit.

Ah. I bet I'm gonna miss the series should ever the producers decide to cut the show. Just like when they stopped airing Ugly Betty. I felt like a part of me was taken away. Sheesh, I need to stop this attachment with TV series. No wonder mata makin rabun.

I'm moving on.

to ANIME now! hehe. as if that's any better   -_-

"Scars remind us where we've been, they don't dictate where we're going"